How protecting your child from change is hurting them

When we jump into change unprepared it can be deeply unsettling and tests our faith and determination. It raises doubts in our personal fears, old woulds and dysfunctional independence. Yet, if we learn to handle change well, we open up our connection to intuition, our faith in the Universe and new levels of creativity, happiness and success. 

When we make decisions for our children we take away the opportunity for them to learn how to respond to change, to test out what works and doesn’t work for them. Change effects everyone uniquely. We often want to protect them from big changes, upset or rocky times, yet this is when they learn and grow while still living in the safety of our nest. When they leave the nest, and go on to college, or a new job, fall in love, deal with loss or have an opportunity to move across the world., they will already know how to respond and not react to change. If we teach rather than protect, they will have the tools to choose what is best for them and move forward.

Teaching our kids that external change doesn’t need to change their values, who they are in their heart, their character goals, and the ability to love and be loved are the tools they need. 

Have a conversation, or several, where they define happiness, success and their values. These definitions show them that they always have a choice how outside circumstances and change affect them. It is how we relate to and interpret the change that is most important. 

Model for your children that who we are doesn’t change because school changes, business changes, or our relationships. The world changes when we do, when we change our experience of the world. Then the world responds differently to us when we show up differently. When we are willing to give the world another chance, then our chance for happiness and success improves. 

Joanne Moore